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Meeting the Disirs |
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Meeting the Disirs |
Thursday, January 03, 2002
Very early in the morning, with too many thoughts swirling through my head I decide that I need to make a quick trip to Nglas to see Evangeline. Evangeline is my host in the Land of Nglas and has been for low these many years. It occurs to me that I would very much like Molly, my host from Dubh, to meet me in Nglas as well. After a night’s sleep and the work I did on my annual I-ching the day before I felt I was approaching clarity on my next step.
My journeys often include what I call the parenthetical asides. The realizations I have when I'm focused on something else. I've learned over the years that these snippets of knowledge or learning are often more important than what ever I think I've come to do consciously.
Standing in the kitchen of the house that I call home in Nglas I find myself really looking at Molly and Evangeline for the first time. Maybe it's the impact of seeing them together. Molly is 5’10 and slender as a reed and Evangeline at most stands 4’8 and as the saying goes, has some meat on her bones in comparison to Molly. I had never thought of the true meaning of that expression before but it means literally what it says; some muscle or meat (not fat) surrounding the bones. How strange that I never really noticed how robustly healthy and fit Evangeline really is.
I walk over to the stove. As usual a kettle was simmering just below the boiling point and a clean pot for tea sits on the counter. "Ladies, house brew or something else?" House brew is of course a white peach tea mixed with Darjeeling.
"House brew" they chorused as they pulled out chairs at the table. While I made our tea, I thought how lucky I am to have these ladies here to help me. Most others who journey on the other side form their relationships with Helpers and Guides very early on. I, on the other hand, had no need for anyone but the Gods and Goddesses. Or so I thought. The High Ones will take time for healing, for teaching, and for listening, but it isn't their job or their function to help you run your life. Essentially you serve them, they do not serve you. The Evangelines and the Mollys of the other world are there to help. My Grandmothers knew them as the Disirs. The household spirits. I can't believe that I really have failed to understand their role in my life for so long.
When I set the pot of tea, milk and cups on the table, Evangeline said, "There's a plate of cookies in the larder, Freya. I made them yesterday but I'm sure they're still fine"
As if they could be otherwise with a spell of freshness placed on them, I thought to myself. Now there's a spell I wish could translate to the other world, though refrigeration and microwaves do a good job approximating.
I place the cookies on the table, sit down, pour my tea and announce. "I think I have made a decision. I'm not going to Ban for my masters level now. If I find I've done the work I'll submit it, but I need to get focused on my next step. I want to earn my Gold Key." For some reason I'm not surprised when a sigh of relief is the first reaction I notice from both woman.
"No more frittering away? No more wandering down strange rat holes when you have work to do? You'll let us help get you organized."
Evangeline reached over and patted Molly's hand. "Now, Now. Don't go pushing the girl too hard. What say you, we all give it a few weeks and see what works out? She'll need to deal with the Other, before things completely straighten round and that might not be so easy."
"The Other?" It's never good when people talk in the verbal equivalent of boldface type. "Who's the other, and what do I have to deal with them about?" I ask with some level of agitation.
"Why Vivienne, of course. There are traps here on the other side, and you ran into one of them. You once wrote that you didn't believe in Split-aparts but they do exist, at least here. They're something like what you refer to as a multiple personality disorder."
I stare at Evangeline in shock. Last time I checked I thought I was fairly well integrated personality. And even if I wasn't I've been to Irfind; I've had shamans bring back missing soul pieces from the land of the Shadow. I've always been willing to do any and all psychic housekeeping that was required to keep my former teachers from Bui happy and myself functioning. So how could Evangeline be hinting at what she was hinting?
Obviously my look of shock conveyed most of my thoughts.
"Manton should have explained this to you years ago, and he would have done it this time if you'd stayed to talk to him. The oversoul exists from life to life. Sometimes under extreme pressure the oversoul can intrude into a physical life and things can get out of balance. In a mentally healthy person, the symptoms will be limited to feeling unfocused or generally discontent or torn in different directions. In a less stable person the symptoms can result at the extreme with possession or multiple personalities. Vivienne is the oversoul intruding. She should never have been able to form a standalone coherent personality. The fact that you two get on so well and have basically co-existed for these last 15 years with no more ill affects then your feeling out of sorts with life is a miracle."
How could I not have realized it? I'd come so close to realizing the truth these last 15 years. I've studied in the real world with people specializing in this type of disorder and we never got to the root issue. Evangeline had to be wrong. If not, it said that I earned my journeyman status from the land of Bui, still suffering from oversoul bleed through.
Go talk to Manton... We'll be here when you get back.
Journey to Bui part 2